Love and Relationships

Queer & Dear

Dr. Frankie Bashan

Queer And Dear – When You Don’t Look Gay: Femme Lesbian Invisibility

Dr. Frankie and Rachel Gill reflect on the frustration of not being seen or welcomed into the lesbian community because of their feminine appearance. Often excluded because of their look, Frankie and Rachel were advised they “should look more gay,” if they wanted to attract dates. Listen as Frankie and Rachel share their struggle with “fitting in” to a lesbian culture and how, by choosing their own paths, they gained the confidence that now allows them to feel pride in their femme identity.

If you’d like to reach Rachel Gill directly please visit her website at: or message her through her Facebook page which is rachelgillcomedy

If you’re interested in coaching or matchmaking please contact Dr. Frankie directly at or call 415.990.2929