The Living Spirit Answers for Healing and Infinite Love which shares
stories of spiritual communication, healing energies, miracles, and ways
to enhance your intuition relationships and awareness of Universal
Energy and am most delighted to welcome Pastor Tobin Crenshaw author of
The Beautiful Lie as he offers a way to find faith in a world gone mad.
As listeners of “Healing from Within” are well aware Sheryl and her
distinguished guests share intimate stories and insights into both our
physical and spiritual worlds as we seek to merge the best of both and
live with tried and true remnants of our soul memories helping us to
understand maneuver and create our best lives by finding truth and trust
in the bigger plan of Spirit both individually and collectively for our
evolving world.
In today’s episode of “Healing from Within” Pastor Crenshaw shares an
unusual story of how like 20,000 pastors who leave the ministry every
year, he joined that group in 2009 and began a deep inward spiritual
journey as he worked full time in the criminal justice field. Five years
later a quadruple homicide committed by a person he had hoped to
rehabilitate and whom he held high hopes for led him back to the pulpit.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw helps us explore the six human needs that drive
all human behavior, and how to experience lasting joy and the best tool
for improving marriage and indeed all aspects of interaction with people
and experiences in life.
When Pastor Tobin is asked to think back to his childhood and remember a
person place or event that may have shown him or others the life path he
would likely follow as an adult he immediately tells us that he lived
with his mother who was a single parent for him and his other brothers
and encouraged them all to reach for their goals in a loving and also
practical way. He also remembers his grandmother who whenever she saw
him always clapped her hands in delight and approached life with a
smile.
Sheryl remarks that almost 65 percent of marriages are ending in divorce
in this very complex materialistically based environment that is causing
many problems for modern day families and often the children are raised
in poverty some become addicts and many do not reach their true
potential to approach life in the joyful manner that your mother and
grandmother established for you.
Pastor Crenshaw tells us that though he was guided to become a pastor he
left in 2009 because he became aware of the limitations of many of the
people working in the field and sought to explore the nature of life
through the spiritual eyes of practices that were open to many different
ways to view spirit life the Universe and love. Very few pastors return
once they leave but he returned after working in the criminal justice
field as he found a need to reconcile spiritual truths with life time
challenges realizing that forgiveness was needed and could be felt even
when evil still existed in the world.
Pastor Tobin’s time away from the pulpit was dedicated to finding
answers for lasting change. Sheryl says that to live in the real world
offers spiritual teachers ways to understand their human needs and
connection both to spirit and to the physical life we are presently
living.
Sheryl remembers that at some point in downloading inspiration from
spiritual messages and practicing Reiki Energy Spiritual healing on
clients she was so overwhelmed by the changes happening to her and
totally committed to learn more so she actually asked God if it was
necessary for her to go into seclusion like monks do, and retreat from
the world for greater connection to Universal Source. Trying to find an
answer how to proceed forward to use her new found spiritual awareness
she opened a small book, a gift with spiritual messages from an
Englishman she met at a healing retreat and just opened to a random
page. Sheryl read, ”In your case, it is not necessary to go to the
mountains to share the love of Spirit. You must be among the people and
serve.” Well the message said something to that effect and my question
was answered.
Many people think the best tool for improving a marriage is learning how
to communicate in a clearer more honest way. But Pastor Tobin thinks we
may know how to communicate but may not know the person very well and
their needs so we are missing the mark for finding greater connection
and love. It is important to meet your spouse’s six needs (certainty,
variety, love significance, growth contribution ) and to meet their
needs in the way they want. But of all the tools for improving
relationships none compares to the impact of “praying together,” the one
thing that reduces divorce rates more than any other.
Sheryl might mention In regard to that thought of more fully knowing
your spouse and how to love them better in her book, The Living Spirit
Sheryl wrote, “Life is about loving what is, which is never perfect—just
in a state of conscious change. If we forget about perfection and just
be, we will find love in our journey. Everything is perfect for
self-discovery, thus perfection is the ability to accept imperfection.
There is no normal or abnormal and no one way to live, love, or develop
our own personal paths. We are all dealing with wounds from this as well
as previous incarnations, and as such are wounded citizens of the
Cosmos. So there are methods to achieve balance courage and
self-confidence in pursuit of life goals and it is nice for us to help
our spouse and children know we hope they find their own path and we can
support them.”
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl share how to tap into the intelligence of the
heart to live a more meaningful life. The brain and the heart are very
connected. When a person is frustrated they are out of sync. When a
person is at peace and happy their brain and heart waves are in sync,
something that can be read on a monitor. You can make them go in sync
with a simple breathing technique thus producing peacefulness in less
than two minutes.
Pastor Tobin wrote, “How important is a healthy spiritual bond in a
marriage? In a stunning study by Gallup Research It was found, “For
couples that pray together every night the divorce rate goes from a
staggering one in two to just one in 1052! So pray for things that you
are passionate about.
He gives us other wonderful quotes such as this one…..Pablo Neruda
wrote, “I don’t know any other way of loving but this, in which there is
no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so
intimate that when I fall asleep, it is your eyes that close.”
Shalom Arush a marriage counselor in the Middle East shares the two most
important keys to a successful relationship are to spend an hour a day
in prayer for the health of your marriage and to never criticize your
wife. It is about leaving the boy and becoming the man you are meant to
be. One of the earliest texts in scripture says a man is to leave his
mother and father and be united with his wife.” You don’t need your
mother any longer to tell you what a good boy you are. And your woman
doesn’t want you to need mommy. In fact it sickens her. “ What she needs
is for you to step up and show up daily with strength and integrity. And
author John Gray offers another important idea that helps to foster a
loving marriage, “There is no greater gift you can give a man than
giving him a task that he can carry out for you or that he can
accomplish. A man bonds through action… but he needs to know it will
make a difference to you.” So loyalty love and knowing what to focus
attention on are important keys for a successful marriage.
Tom Marshall affirms we are all born with two needs: the need for love
and the need for significance. There is a simple tool Pastor Tobin tells
us that can end the cycle of habituation or simply being aware of the
problems they are enduring endlessly through boredom or lack of paying
attention to what has become common place for them and that is the “ten
minute rule, “It requires for the first ten minutes upon coming home
both the husband and wife show nothing but excitement to be together and
discuss nothing but positive events. Both put themselves in an
empowering state before coming together and generate enthusiasm
The first step for anyone that wants to make a positive change is to
recognize that a change is needed and possible. A true decision means
that a person has reached a tipping point where they will no longer
settle for how things have been. The moment a decision is made,
everything begins to change. One effective strategy for making positive
changes is to stop using word curses. Starting things like “This will
never change, “ or I tried that in the past and it did not work, can
cause subconscious blocks.
Sheryl says..I often tell my clients that in the course of every day
almost 75 percent of the thoughts that float into our minds will be
negative, but the key is to not engage those thoughts and hold them in
the running story in your brain making them your reality…Disengage and
wait for more positive inspirational ideas and suggestions to float in
and embrace those.
Pastor Tobin goes on to say “The words you use make you feel a certain
way: they create emotions. What you tell yourself on a consistent basis
is everything. Moore and Gillette state, “Words, in fact, define our
reality: they define our worlds.”
Sometimes all that is needed is someone to point us in a different
direction. Different standards, different life. Remember that and you
will go far in making positive changes.
Kaurek Ashley shares, The most successful habit, or success muscle you
can develop for yourself—the habit that will guarantee you the happy,
healthy, wealthy, successful, fulfilled life you deserve—is the habit of
being consistent and relentless in making sure you’re constantly filling
your mind with only positive empowering thoughts.
Pastor Tobin tells us of two divinely inspired stories in his book. The
first one is about Ken Gaub a musician with a traveling band who felt
like his life was stagnant and he wasn’t making a difference with his
work. Ken Gaub on tour walked by a pay phone and heard it ringing so he
picked up the receiver. The person on the other end was suicidal and
prayed to speak with Ken and the person who was trying to help him heard
the numbers in his head and dialed them. Ken Gaub was by that very phone
at that very moment at the gas station and was able to help that person.
Ken continued with his music and that person continued to live.
The other story was of a little girl that was kidnapped by a group of
bad men and as she tried to escape was saved by a pride of lions that
mauled her captors. Then the lions sat down beside her to protect her
until the police came. The lions left and were never seen again. The
story made international news. There are angels that help us protect us
to complete our life journey and miracles that come from divine
intervention. Sheryl has stories of miracles and help from Spirit in her
next book New Life Awaits: The Eyes of Spirit Share Evolution Revolution
Global Awakening.
Sheryl says that she was recently contacted by a former guest of the
show Ruth Anderson who was creating a summit for Enlightened World
Enlightened Women living their spiritual path and Ruth said that in
meditation she was told that 500,000 angels are now on the planet
working with us to create miracles and help people once again remember
who they are as souls having a physical life, connected to Universal
Source. As a Reiki energy healer Sheryl has and does witness miracles
large and small quite regularly. A recent one that can be observed
happened in Minnesota when a five year old boy was thrown from the third
floor by a very troubled man in a mall and received life threatening
injuries. Sheryl cried seeing that beautiful bright smiling young face
and sent energy and prayers every day for two weeks feeling as an empath
how really serious the injuries were. One day on twitter Sheryl saw a
post saying the boy was alert and being moved out of intensive care and
Sheryl just thanked God for the miracle of his survival against all
odds. Many people must have been sending their prayers and thoughts as
well.
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl go on to discuss the emotion that destroys fear
and how to experience more of this empowering feeling. Gratitude and
love is the opposite of fear. It is possible to experience both emotions
simultaneously. If someone can appreciate something in the moment, fear
will disappear. And we can always find something to appreciate.
Sheryl says: But for people who tend to run negative or feel the glass
is half empty, they may need to be reminded by others who function in a
more positive and trusting way and who do inner work to realize what
sets off any doubt negativity or sorrow so now in each moment, they have
an opportunity to monitor their reactions, check what triggers bad
feelings or fear. They may begin to choose ways to respond to events so
they are not lingering in old painful feelings and old ways of reacting.
It becomes easier as the process is practiced as a ritual and routine,
allowing in each moment, new thoughts of being whole and happy which
then are incorporated into our heart energy.
Love or feelings of interconnectiveness to the energy of people and
events is also a way to know yourself more clearly as a spiritual being
having a physical life and remembering you are more than the conflict or
challenge. We have an infinitely powerful soul energy that can bring
change to any issue being faced by tapping into love and gratitude.
Many experiences as a pastor have taught Pastor Tobin about the negative
aspects of human behavior. We learn that people want to dominate and
control others because they lack meaning in their life. Many carry
wounds from their past and take those hurts out on others. What they
don’t realize is they are creating a cycle that never ends until someone
says “enough.” The person in pain causes pain, and in return receives
more pain. It is the insanity of selfishness.
Pastor Tobin also speaks about a great truth that many people do not
know or fail to remember and it is this. Psychologist Irving Kirsch
notes, “response expectancy theory” when we expect to feel anxious,
relaxed, joyful, or depressed, our expectations tend to produce those
feelings. At its extreme such a mindset can even lead to self-induced
death as has been well documented by tribes in which a powerful curse is
often fulfilled as the person wastes away and dies unless a way to
reverse the curse is found. If the person believes the curse is real,
death often follows. Such is the power of conviction creating a self
prophesying event.
Numerous psychology studies have shown that if a number of people start
to ask a person if they are tired or okay or not feeling well, before
long, the person might actually start to feel ill because as Morrow
notes, “We must realize that once a certain thought is repeated in the
mind, there is left in the chemistry of the individual a recorded
imprint. As you try to make changes and rid your mind of self defeating
thoughts, so we need to change those thoughts and cure ourselves of
various upsets and hurts we have endured, remembering which words create
feeling and how those feelings affect the way we behave. So it behooves
us to eliminate negative fearful unproductive thinking and replace it
with positive joyful thoughts and action.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw migh want readers of A Beautiful Lie to take away
with them after reading your book what he wrote, “In the United States a
woman is battered every 15 seconds by her husband or boyfriend: four of
these women die each day. My partner would regularly shake his head and
ask night after night, “What is wrong with people?”It seems that
confusion and division have become the new norm. But there are men and
women of high character in the world, as well as down through history,
who like the women whose stories I have told make what are miraculous
choices. These champions beckon us to raise our standards, to live
different and to know what can seem so impossible become possible.”
The story Pastor Tobin told in regard to this was : When Nelson Mandela
was released from prison and became the leader of South Africa he
established panels to investigate acts of brutality that had taken place
under apartheid. One particular case purportedly involved a woman who
was forced to watch her husband be killed by lawless police officers.
Unconscionably, the same men had also killed her sons several years
prior. Before her husband drew his final breath, he whispered to her,
“Forgive them.” Years later the men who committed these atrocities were
brought to trial and the judge asked her what she felt would be a
fitting punishment. The courtroom waited as the former mother and wife
gave her response, saying, “I want three things, “ I want him to take me
to the place where the burned my husband’s body so I can gather up the
dust and give him a decent burial. Second since I still have a lot of
love left in my heart she requested the officer be required to meet with
her twice a month so she could be a mother to him. Third, I would like
this man to know that he is forgiven by God, and that I forgive him too.
At that moment the officer fainted.
When we can forgive the most unforgivable offender we are truly free of
anger and fear and embrace only the divine. Not easy but it can be done
with strong faith and trust that everything happens according to a
divine plan and our souls enlarge with greater compassion and love if we
make that choice to trust.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw author of Beautiful Lies: Finding Faith in a World
Gone Mad has shared an intensive spiritual journey gathering many
stories of spiritual truths in a most expansive and truthful rendering
from his many experiences as a military police officer, probation office
and mentor to those who transitioned from prison to a halfway house and
also gathered religious training and interactions with people who have
suffered unimaginable challenges: on the edge of divorce, of
contemplating suicide, or being unable to reach a goal and many
depressed people who have finally found peace of mind through his
sensitive and guided assistance. Pastor Crenshaw has produced a book
that brims with wisdom and the quotes and stories of leaders throughout
history seeking to know both human and divine nature.
In summarizing today’s episode we have traveled the often untraveled
path of engaging our own self-doubt and to find that within us is an
alignment through our soul and faith to higher universes of love and
eternal life and to build with resilience and hard work the way to
loving life and living out our dreams reaching our earthly and spiritual
goals and finding peace and happiness.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw has expressed this eloquently and wrote,” It is
widely accepted that there is a vast difference between a justice system
and a legal system. The latter is what we have: the former is what we
wish was true. From politicians to judges to religious leaders and
managers of financial institutes, it seems the further we go along in
history, the more people move away from the north. Yet amidst all this,
there is an answer, but it will take effort on our part. It will take
becoming better. It will mean moving from belief to action and
committing to unlearning much of what we have been programmed to
believe. It has been well said that a deeper spiritual life and faith
will not make your life problem free, but you will come to learn there
is a purpose and meaning for your existence. And when you know that you
can make a difference.”
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl would have you remember that as an energy being
resonating in the love of Spirit and guided through the whispers of
inspiration from the many great thinkers artists spiritualists musicians
healers and divine souls, it is never too late to make choices that will
bring you closer to what makes your heart sing and bring a smile to
adorn your face. It could be as easy as finding gratitude and faith in
unbounded abundance for living with love. Be loving share yourself and
your dreams and create a happy healthy journey for what you think, put
your attention on is what we become. Let us become what we already
are…Divine!
Today’s Guest