NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ALL EMOTIONS HAVE MUCH TO TEACH US
Welcome to “Healing From Within” with your host Sheryl Glick author of The Living Spirit: Answers for Healing and Infinite love and Sheryl’s newly released book, completing the trilogy, A New Life Awaits: Spirit Guided Insights to Share Global Awakening which shares stories of spiritual awakening spiritual communication healing energies miracles and ways to understand life in both it’s physical and emotional context. We learn our challenges are not merely economic political or societal but a deep disconnect from our true being and soul wisdom. Sheryl is delighted to welcome Randy Taran founder and CEO of Project Happiness and author of her newest book Emotional Advantage which provides insights into the lessons negative emotions have to offer so you may take control of your emotional life for transformation and progress.
As listeners of “Healing From Within” are well aware, Sheryl and her guests share intimate stories and insights into our dual nature of physical and energetic life and explore areas of self-awareness, self-realization and self -investigation as we learn to master our emotions and move from fear trauma or misconceptions opinions or beliefs that hold us back from realigning to higher vibrations or emotions of happiness and joy. It is in understanding the true nature of who we are and where we come from that we begin to make better decisions and choices for creating lives of personal growth prosperity and happiness.
In today’s episode of Healing From Within Randy Taran will share ideas and techniques that may guide you to the emotional advantage of being aware, skillful and resilient no matter what situation you face. As a producer of an award -winning documentary on the nature of happiness working with George Lucas Richard Gere and neuroscientist, Richard Davidson and also working as a board member of the Dalai Lama Foundation Randy shares thoughts on happiness habits, preventive wellness and emotional resilience.
Randy’s book is called Emotional Advantage: Embracing All Your Feelings to Create a Life You Love. Randy tells us what made her start to think differently about her emotions, and goes on to say that she had been focusing on happiness in the institute she had established and received many questions on how to deal with the flip side or reverse of happiness which are the negative emotions like sadness sorrow fear and anger. Randy and Sheryl discuss the question: what if instead of hijacking our mind and traumatizing us or putting us in a state of self-doubt or resistance, we could use the messages of these events and emotions to create new perceptions and opportunities to live a more fulfilled life journey? It turns out we can learn how fear moves us to courage, how guilt can clarify our values, and how anger can help us create healthy boundaries.
Randy shares the kind of research she has focused on as her findings are based on neuroscience and how can we use this knowledge to support and happiness.
First Randy says that she is not a researcher—her specialty is curating the best of what’s out there from the psychology neuroscience and mindfulness and translating it into actionable tips and challenges that we all can actually use in everyday life. The science tells us that” we can change our brains” and rewire the pathways to higher awareness and functioning and that’s good and well and this book tells you how.
Everyone at birth is given a spectrum of emotions. Randy find the emotion that was hardest to write about she would have to say was shame that was challenging—it’s something we don’t talk about much –its deep in the dungeon of our minds. Fear, sadness, anger were runner ups and the thing is they all can help guide us to our best lives if we know how to work with them.
Sheryl says that she has been fortunate to have been wired as part of her intuitive healing and mediumship skills to help people and to be consistent and wholesome in her responses to people…Sometimes when she gets angry when people act inappropriately she forgets she is only human and deep feelings make her uncomfortable in her spiritual body, but have not often acted that way towards others. Still Sheryl feels sadness at the pain others inflect on others. As a medium and empath she has felt the shame fear sorrow anger as well as the joy and love of her clients. One day in a reading Sheryl saw a doll like Raggedy Ann fall down and was so weak she couldn’t get up and the client told Sheryl that doll represented her for she was sexually abused by her father as a child and she couldn’t understand why he would hurt her that way. She felt shame for something her troubled father did and Sheryl immediately told her she was not a victim but a hero as she survived, and she should not think of it any longer, as he was the problem and needed help. The past is gone and only a memory but if we think about it in the present moment, we are reliving the horror or sadness. Sheryl is not sure why people who are hurt by others feel shame but sometimes they do and if affects them in many negative ways till they can realize the truth. Sheryl says she has probably never felt shame for she knows every experience we have is programed into our soul life journey and how we handle it to the best of our ability is the only reason some of these most difficult experiences happen. If we learn to allow accept and surrender to the challenge nothing can really hurt us and we can resolve most issues with greater love and compassion for ourselves and others. It takes awareness and practice.
In Randy’s opinion the most common way people deal with difficult feelings is in two ways—wither they let it ALL out, (explode, wail) or keep it all in (stuff the emotions, take things out on yourself instead of others)—denial is pretty popular too. But the thing is, when we suppress what we’re feeling those feelings become monsters. When we see them, and accept them ( hey ,nobody’s perfect—we’re not supposed to be) we get to work with their information and architect a life we love.
Sheryl says that the word “Perfection” is such a source of conflict for most people. Some children have assumed it is their job to make everyone happy and if they don’t succeed at that, which of course is impossible, they have failed themselves and have not been able to live up to the expectations of parents teachers colleagues and so on. In Sheryl’s book The Living Spirit in regard to this mistruth Sheryl wrote, “Recognizing another avenue for finding happiness is possible when we finally admit, “Not only are we not perfect, no one is perfect.” We must continue to learn what makes us tick, and what makes others react as they do, but should acknowledge that we can only change ourselves and our outdated thinking by realizing we are responsible for our own actions. The choice to accept others and ourselves with our frailties and sometimes negative behaviors can be hard, yet it is necessary in order to have times when we feel we are on cloud 9.”
Randy shares some of the authors or healers who have inspired her during the creation of Emotional Advantage. Oh so many: brene brown Kristin Neff, Dan Siegel, Rick Hanson Richie Davidson, Tal Ben Shahar even Rumi, Marcus Aurelius too, who writes, “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
Randy has incorporated experiences that have happened to her and your loved ones into her book. That inspired parts of the book certainly—It’s why she started this whole journey in the first place, but Randy could not have written it if she myself wasn’t looking for answers. What she learned is that making friends with your so- called negative emotions, the shadow side gives you more awareness hence more choices and leads to a sense of well- being peace and gratitude for being free of engaging any negative feeling for too long. Know it and then release it allowing for more positive events and feelings to surface.
Living in Silicon Valley, Randy has seen all the stress people go through at work and in study influenced her interest in mental and emotional wellbeing. It’s here for sure and everywhere. It’s in the air we breathe our addictions to our devices the pressure to be seen as perfect. Four out of ten people in the US self-report as lonely; it’s an epidemic. The WHO has declared depression the greatest cause of disability, even ahead of heart disease, and that’s globally. One in five people say they deal with anxiety even kids. This is a wake -up call for all of us.
Sheryl says In her new book A New Life Awaits Spirit Guided Insights to Support Global Awakening she recognizes that it is not the political economic societal or religious issues that are the real problem we are facing worldwide. It is a spiritual disconnect from our natural loving state of being to Universal Source and to the goodness and compassion that is being stifled by the outside world. Looking “within” to the true source of the eternal circle of life is the way past harmful negative emotions and events and the path to peace which is simply knowing who you are as eternal spiritual beings having a physical life for the purpose of refining your magnificent soul potential and energy no matter what life challenges you face.
In Randy’s opinion the genre of emotions is so special. We have an inner compass inside of ourselves and we’ve forgotten how to use it. And in a culture that values appearance over authenticity, we often ignore the clues our emotions are giving us to help us navigate. It’s easier when life is good but complex in times like these. We need to be able to work with how we are feeling, and that does not mean stuffing it away and pretending that it’s all good. We need emotional literacy to have emotional intelligence and most people have no clue what their emotions are trying to communicate.
Sheryl responds, “Reiki energy healing sessions help a person to connect to this internal guidance system and wisdom and perceive new thoughts that can enable them to start to make changes in their health plan and relationships. Feeling your essence experientially is the best way to know what is best for you.”
The one thing Randy thinks readers generally don’t know about emotional intelligence and will be surprised to learn is that we all like good emotions like happiness and desire, but what we don’t realize is that even the toughest emotions are sending messages to alert, protect and fuel us forward. The good news is that this can be accessed if you know how. Randy loves the quote by Jon-Kabat – Zinn, “ You can’t stop the waves but you can learn how to surf.”
One of the most astounding things Randy learned about feelings when writing is that we don’t have to live on alert that our emotions will “take over our lives. When we welcome or embrace all feeling and listen to them, they have the power to bring us back to our strongest selves, capable of not only self-love but to having wonderful relationships with others and above all aligned to our true nature of goodness kindness and compassion.
Randy has incorporated many of the tenets of Project Happiness into this Emotional Advantage. Yes, she has incorporated many of the tenets from Project Happiness. Mindful Monday, Gratituesday, Wellness Wednesday Thoughtful Thursday, Freedom Friday, Social Saturday, Soul Sunday these actually reshape –the neural pathways of our brain, but it goes further delving into the science of tougher emotions, and challenging the reader to USE the wisdom of ALL emotions—yes, even sadness anxiety anger and fear to inform our awareness and choices. The result: we are not a victim of circumstances regain the power to create a life we love.
Sheryl often says to people…. “No one takes your personal power away unless you allow it and if people act badly it is their problem not yours.”
Without giving too much away, what vital resources are you giving your readers. Every chapter has tips and strategies both reflection and challenge questions to meet where you are and inspire you towards creating your better life. Let me say one thing—this book is not about being happy all the time: A—that is not possible and B—it’s the fastest way to become Unhappy! Happiness is not the absence of obstacles: it’s an inner reservoir that helps us handle whatever comes our way.
Sheryl asks Randy: in a culture that tells us to push down our emotions and worries in order to work harder, how important to you is it that people are able to deal with difficult feelings without becoming overwhelmed? Randy tells us it is important when people get overwhelmed, they either fight go into flight or get paralyzed and freeze. Our emotions are telling us to recalibrate, when to course correct, and when to take a break. The idea of crushing it, killing it and dominating leaves no room for self-awareness and self- care—it’s antiquated—people may rally in the short run, but we’re seeing more anxiety burnout depression and suicide and a declining life expectancy rate than any society before us. With self-compassion, people are more resilient, more productive and simply have better lives.
Randy tells us that literary success to her means giving people proven tools to take charge of their emotions and their lives. Her dream is that this book reaches people everywhere especially people who need a little boost and it will not only shift their lives but the lives of those around them. The message is clear; pure grit is not enough. With self-compassion, people are more resilient, more productive and simply have better lives.
Sheryl thanks Randy Taran author of Emotional Advantage for providing a powerful way to discover how useful emotions can be in guiding us towards a healthy and productive life.
In summarizing today’s episode we have come to see all our emotions as necessary and useful for helping us be aware of who we are and what we truly need to live our best lives resonating with love and connecting to our inner intuitive wisdom for being at peace. We have discovered that we often have hidden our feelings and may have experienced guilt or regret and may find that those times were the pathway to becoming more aware and aligned to life. We have also discovered how we have the personal power to grow beyond the negative emotions and conquer fear and limitations to make choices that ultimately bring us to a higher state of knowing and loving this challenging physical life experience.
As Randy wrote, in this journey of demystifying our emotions we have learned that there is a reason for every emotion to exist. Each plays a role in guiding us back to our true nature. The world preaches separation, lack, competition and conflict. We are born in wholeness, innate peace, and full awareness. We can choose to believe we are not enough, or we can cut through the illusion to connect to the fullness of who we truly are. Each person has the capacity –no exceptions.”
Randy and Sheryl would encourage you to simply feel more deeply as in this time in a spiritual evolution there is much trauma and drama being created and we can grow more aware of the gift of life and Spirit if we embrace our feelings and find the opportunity for personal growth in all that we must experience to finally realize we are spiritual beings having a physical life and all is well.
Sheryl Glick host of Healing From Within and author of a trilogy with the newest book A New Life Awaits invites you to visit her website www.sherylglick.com to read about and listen to leaders in the visionaries and leaders in the metaphysical scientific spiritual religious medical and psychology arts and music fields of creative energy to assist in the personal and collective evolution of humanity. Shows may also be heard on www.webtalkradio.net and www.dreamvisions7radio.com.